Thursday, January 24, 2013

I Remember The First Time...

Good morning everyone.  Well, it turns out that I'm NOT going to do a post yesterday, but that you will be getting the next installment of my holiday trip to Las Vegas tomorrow...  :)  As I told you last time, Thursdays will now have a new theme here on Bikini Hill, just as Tuesdays do.  You have seen "Could You? Tuesdays" - now it's time for... (drumroll please, and don't look up at the title of today's entry..., don't do it..., don't...) "I Remember The First Time" Thursdays.

My friend Nick Kass was the inspiration for this idea.  When you stop and think about it, most of our friends who make us laugh have something about them, something that they say, or an expression..., SOMETHING that they habitually say or do that you can identify with them.  Nick uses this tagline, which I have never heard anybody else use before, so we'll have to remember that when my blog blows up and this tagline becomes a "household insult."  For example, if we happened to see a drunk person stumbling out of a bar, Nick might say, "I remember the first time I tried alcohol..."  (Nick is actually funny, but you get the idea)...  I will be using this line in Nick's style sometimes, and sometimes I will be using it to relay things to you that I actually remember from my past.  Welcome to the new Thursdays everyone...

I remember the first time I wasn't funny...  Working the door at my job, I verify that customers are at least 21 years-old before they enter our establishment (Harper's/Slackers/The Veranda for those of you familiar with San Marcos, America).  The following scenario occurs so often that I can't even muster a fake smile:  a potential customer will approach me and say, "oh, let me find my fake I.D." or "you better check his I.D., he isn't 21" - etc, etc, ETC...  Ugghhh...  Please try to be original people, or maybe..., maybe just give us your driver's license without the monologue...

I remember the first time I was a doppleganger...  I think that I've addressed this in the blog before, where I ROUTINELY get told that I look like somebody (God bless their souls)...  When I dealt poker in Las Vegas, that's where this phenomenon occurred most frequently.  "Has anyone ever told you that you look like Woody Harrelson, Dennis Leary, Robin Williams, Owen Wilson, etc, etc, etc...?"  I like the fact that these people don't look like EACH OTHER, but that's beside the point...  :)  Last night a couple came up to me, and I agreed to pose for a picture with the girl after she told me that I looked like here sister's boyfriend (again, God bless him)...  This story is actually timely because I carded a young lady on Monday night, and my first words to her were, "do you get Reese Witherspoon?"  She smiled and replied, "yes, sometimes..."  :)

I remember the first time I couldn't contain my laughter...  Okay, this wasn't the first time, but this happened last night also.  A pretty blonde girl approached me at the front door, looking up toward The Veranda with every step.  When she reached me, she handed me her license, gave me a big smile, and then when I looked at her license, I noticed that she had an EVEN BIGGER SMILE in her photo.  I just started laughing out loud...  :)  Sometimes when I look at a license, the photo is FUNNY for some other reason, and I try not to smirk (poker face, thank you), but in this case, it seemed like she was mugging for me just so that I knew for sure that it was her photo on the license...  :)

I remember the first time that I had an ego...  Again, not really the first time, but at some point not very long after I started writing this blog, I searched for "The View From Bikini Hill" on both Yahoo! and Google - NOTHING...  As time passed, I could find my little blog listed on Google (this site is Google-sponsored), and then eventually on Yahoo!...  A couple of days ago I typed just the words "bikini hill" into both Google and Yahoo!, and my blog came up at the..., TOP OF THE LISTINGS...  ;)

I remember the first time that I was a drug dealer...  You'll like this...  When I left the teaching/coaching job that I held for four years here in San Marcos, America, I let my hair grow out (surfer style) for a while, and I would sometimes go down to The Square and hang out.  More than once, total strangers approached me and asked if I had any drugs or if I wanted to buy some drugs...  They tell you that you shouldn't judge a book by its cover, but what else are you supposed to judge it by when you see it for the first time?...  :)

I remember the first time that I felt COMPLETELY HORRIBLE in college...  When I was a junior attending what was then Southwest Texas State University here in San Marcos, America, I had a psychology class with a volleyball player that I had a crush on since I was a freshman (I had MANY crushes in college)...  :)  I attended most of the Bobcat volleyball games when I was an undergraduate, so I was very happy to be in her class.  Well, one day in passing, we were talking down the hallway to each other (she was a few doors down the hallway from me, and while we weren't quite shouting, we weren't standing next to each other either - I should write novels, shouldn't I?  I'm SO GOOD at describing the setting)...  ANYWAY, as she stops to stand in the doorway of the room that she was entering, the door CLOSES, and the EDGE OF THE DOOR catches her RIGHT... ABOVE... THE... EYE...  Yes, I'm talking a cut that she had to get STITCHES FOR, and watching her play volleyball that night at Strahan Coliseum knowing that I WAS THE REASON that she had that dressing over her eye...  :(  This would have been a great story if we ended up getting married and lived happily-ever-after, wouldn't it??...  :P

I hope that you like the new theme days here on Bikini Hill, and I'll see you again tomorrow with the next installment of my Las Vegas series.  Have a great day!


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